Wednesday, June 15, 2016

The Blue of Your Eyes

I had such a visceral dream the other night, I've not been able to let it go.   It centered around  a woman I deeply admire artistically and one who is a mutual friend with me and Lost Boy.  In fact, she dated him at one time briefly before she married.

We shall, for this retelling, call her The Witch.   Incidentally, he has gorgeous blue eyes... a complete coincidence and a connection I didn't make with this song until today.  Songs are kind of an asshole like that.  They grip you and hurt you in ways you would never think possible, even if you previously thought them innocuous.  I trust no songs anymore.

The Magnetic Fields // I Don't Believe You  // i // 2004

I had a dream 
And you were in it
The blue of your eyes was infinite
You seemed to be in love with me
Which isn't very realistic

 The Witch brought me to this apartment complex that she really wanted to move into with her husband. The complex was built on a hill overlooking a precipice but the place she was interested in was adjacent to the cookie cutter red brick beehive complex.

She showed me the river and talked of the local plants and brought me and Lost Boy into the place she wanted to rent which was previously intended as an art place. It was massive! A huge warehouse place that could be made into anything and previously housed 6 other people but currently only had a husband and wife and their small child. They were artists.

 She disappeared while me and Lost Boy wandered about on our own. I found doors within doors, rooms within rooms, including a bathroom (that I really needed) that was guarded by a very aggressive rottweiler. Which she later told me was a member of the artist community.   As though it created work as well, a sentient being.

I found myself in rooms where the walls changed shape, the bathroom became a portal to another space, one in which The Witch had transcended her body and was no longer human, though she looked like one. She no longer spoke a language, she was something else. Something fey.. I don't have another word for it.

The Witch was watching over me and Lost Boy as we performed an intimate bodily act, not sexual necessarily but intimate. He laid on top of me and we were naked. Breathing deeply together, I massaged his nipples; we breathed as one. He said no but what was wanted was known and it felt like he wanted me continue but was hesitating.. There was a person that interrupted us, not a person exactly but a shroud. A ghost like person, both hidden and ever present. She only watched but controlled everything.

The Witch disappeared and it felt very lonely and scary. The guard dogs and cats were prevalent, they weren't scared of her but when she wasn't around, they were very aggressive and observant. There was a moment when I finally found my way to the bathroom having had to fight my way through closing doors and secret hallways/rooms to get in and out. The bathroom became a tunnel to a different place, not a good one.  I had to unravel the riddle to figure out another way to go, without meeting the aggressive dog again.

I remember The Witch's hair and demeanor quite clearly as well as her calm and slightly dismissive tone describing the place. She set me free to explore but was distant about the secrets of the place. It was quite large and nebulous. She was so excited about the artistic background of the place.  Lost Boy and I lost each other but would meet each other again and again, holding hands.

No comments:

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...