Friday, November 30, 2012

Bat Feelings

Yo La Tengo - Upside Down

Mary calls from far away
sure there is another
Walks the floor cause she can't settle down
Waiting for the phone to ring
Stuck inside the bedroom
Drinks too much to make the room spin round
When she sits down
No one knows the world is upside-down
Watches how it spins around 

Radiohead [On a Friday] - Upside Down

Yes you read correctly, this bumpy tune is from the early days of not quite Radiohead when they were still calling themselves On a Friday.  It's really strange to hear their roots knowing how they would later progress.   In both the sounds and the lyrics you get a glimpse of something raw and amusing but damn am I relieved they ultimately changed directions.  Still this little diddy would fit well on an easy breezy mix.  Get to it lovelies.

* You can read both the lyrics and a bit more about the tune here.

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Words Vanish In The Haze

wreath of misty breathy words of... 
rising above her head,
hair shines under stars,
 in the cold crisp moon-
 light lit night
 dissipate into nothing I would call
 is her happy quiet
 I'm-so-glad-it's-you smile
 is what she seems to say with
 subtle, too much for words,
 is her manner as she reaches out
 -her fingers cold in the autumn air-
 gently brushes my face
 the heat, nearly burning me,
 of her gaze, not gazing, pulling
 me into the depths I so do love to sink
 with her into time where
 like her eyes in the starry starry night
 we will dance to
 the music of this moment is forever. 

- James Pete Taylor

Music of the moment is a funny phrase to me right now because not only have the speakers of my laptop gone fuzzy, last night my headphones died.  So for the next few days I'll listen to the music in my head and the soul/classic rock currently playing at my new job [think Joe Cocker and The Doobie Brothers].  Last week it was 80s, I mean good 80s... like toe tapping Thompson Twins Lay Your Hands On Me awesome which incidentally is one of my favorite sparky tunes of all time.  In fact, as I'm typing this post and grooving to it on my fuzzed out speakers, my pup Mavis just crawled into half of my lap and laid a paw on my boob. Like I said FAVORITE. 

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

She's Out There Somewhere

I miss this.  I miss you.  Hungering deeply for the quiet; life has become this active 'what's next' domino effect. The darkness calls me with a childlike tug but I'm sorry darling, I'm so busy I can't stop to calm it.  It's pushed deep down for now.

Beach Fossils' cover of Slowdive Alison is as close to nostalgia I dare to swim these days.

Listen close, and don't be stoned
I'll be here in the morning
Cause I'm just floating
Your cigarette still burns
Your messed-up world will thrill me
Alison, I'm lost
Alison, I said we're sinking
There's nothing here but that's okay
Outside your room, your only sister's spinning
But she lies, tells me she's just fine
I guess she's out there somewhere
And the sailors they strike poses
TV covered walls, and so slowly
With your talking and your pills
Your messed-up life still thrills me
Alison, I'm lost
Alison, I'll drink your wine
I wear your clothes, when we're both high
Alison, I said we're sinking
But you laugh and tells me it's just fine
I guess she's out there somewhere

Sunday, November 18, 2012

When You Lose Them

Something strange happens after your heart has been brutalized in ways you could never imagine.  An invisible veil separates the Once Bitten from the thrice.  So at the moment when you're now ready to put yourself out there; to explore the scary world of singles and try anew and for whatever reason it doesn't work out, the heartbreak just isn't as palpable anymore.  You can see into the hearts of others more clearly, understanding their motives and undercurrents so fully... the future almost writes itself.  No bitterness to be felt, just a nodding acceptance.

Not trying to be super dramatic, however; at one time my heart was broken following the end of a relationship with someone I argued with constantly and then again by someone I never had the chance to with audibly argue but felt the tense unsaid ripples in my bones.  This knowledge is hard won and once gained not easily lost, becoming a permanent fixture within.  My point is that these little goodbyes don't hurt so much anymore.  With time and wisdom, we can finally see them coming and subsequently let them go with grace and understanding.  We can say, "You're not the one and that's ok."  Our hearts are open enough to wish them well; to send them light and love as we continue on our journey. 

Since I'm still not ready to have that uncomfortable conversation about The Cranberries , in the interim please enjoy [or don't] this little ballad that has come to mean so much to me.

The Cranberries - No Need To Argue

[Though I guess I wouldn't be human if I didn't harbor some snarkiness at times about any of the above, I'm not another Mother Theresa after all.  But that's what my Twitter is for.] 

Art by Ruth Bradley

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Good Advice For Someone Like Me

Leonard, I'm doing my part and today that means a Surf Pop Montage. 

behind the pain
someone is rejoicing

behind the torture
there is love

who's going to buy
this bullshit

if you don't become the ocean
you'll be seasick
every day

-Leonard Cohen
*Track listing can be found here.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

A Phase of Terror

Scared and excited.  Our hearts say Yes just as our brains start to say No.

He means tomorrow but says "In a bit"
and doesn't show up at all
he sets his watch to a comet's orbit
remembers to forget to call

No courage for love - too scared to be happy

I do.... don't

"Your place or mine?" means "Heaven or hell?"
two addresses somewhat apart
his home's dark and spiky, her's clear as a bell
it's over before they can start

No courage for love - too scared to be happy

I do.... don't

And tomorrow passed them by

Monday, November 12, 2012

Calling Hell

Pretty damn excited about the wild foxes, Lindsey and Julie of Deap Vally. [I would kill for Julie's hair].  Girl drummers are so hot, just check out Poni from The Ettes.  Lindsey's pipes on track Baby I Call Hell give me aches and shivers...but just check out Miss Hotcakes Julie in the video for their new single End of World, due out November 19.  Pretty hearthumpingly wicked.  Can't wait for their debut to finally get released.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

To Hell With Your Narrow Mind

There are a lot of opinions out there about The Cranberries and at some point I want to add my own two cents but tonight is not the night.  It's Sunday, a night typically reserved for heavy depressive thoughts centered largely around anxiety and avoidance.  Not tonight though.  Only two days remain before I'm free of Babylon Tower and Free to Decide fits this impromptu wine dance party I'm having like a hand in glove.

It's not worth anything,
More than this at all
I'll live as I choose,
Or I will not live at all

So return to where you come from,
Return to where you dwell,
Because harassment's not my forte,
But you do it very well.

I'm free to decide, I'm free to decide,
And I'm not so suicidal after all

You must have nothing,
More with your time to do
There's a war in Russia,
And Sarajevo too

So to hell with what you're thinking,
And to hell with your narrow mind,
You're so distracted from the real thing,
You should leave your life behind, behind.

Phantom Seeking

The kids over at Neglected Nuggets post some pretty awesome neglected gems and the other day posted a link to Catherine Wheel's Black Metallic, which to me is not neglected band at all!  In fact, I posted that track last October paired with an absolutely breathtaking poem by Sally Ashton [I also posted about them here and here].

Catherine Wheel is very much alive in my aural rotation and one of the most brilliant though sadly underrated bands.  This love extends quite deeply and they have been present at just about every major crossroads in my life.  Bands are funny in that way... after an undetermined period of time, they cease being just a band and become a part of you.  Like the tree gnarled around concrete, organic and man-made joined in something resembling not quite symbiotic harmony... maybe it is survival, a love that must last a lifetime.  Without one, the other dies.  

I adore this song even though when watching the video, I try to ignore that its muddy naked pottery theme closely resembles the pornographic-light scene in that ghost movie with that dirty dancer and just concentrate on Rob's piercingly mesmerizing eyes and his adorable floral shirt.

An infraction easily ignored when hearing these lovely lyrics:

You're making me doubt myself  
This feeling I know so well  
Visions of naked greed  
Are visions I just don't need

Far deep, phantom seeking, I can see  
The nude that broke my heart  
The nude that broke my heart

Far from living, I can see  
The nude that broke my heart  
The nude that broke my heart

The texture of moistened skin  
All over this skin I've been  
Skin that's been angel stretched 
No muscle or excess flesh

Far deep, phantom seeking, I can see  
The nude that broke my heart  
The nude that broke my heart
Far from living, I can see  

The nude that broke my heart  
The nude that broke my heart

You're making me doubt myself  
This feeling I know so well  
Feeling of naked lust  
This feeling I love so much

Far deep, phantom seeking, oh you are  
The nude that broke my heart  
The nude that broke my heart
Phantom breathing, oh you are

The nude that broke my heart  
The nude that broke my heart

Upon the wall, the life is drawn  
The love is lost, the truth will fall  
The sinking ship, the sinking soul  
The final fear, the picture on the wall

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Blood Lust [NSFW]

Happy Birthday to Bram Stoker; here's hoping he's enjoying immortality with that beasty devil inside.  Blood portraits from photographer John Ross's series entitled Bloods would inspire blood lust in anyone.  Anatomically arresting, more than a little bit creepy and undoubtedly messy to execute, I'm drawn to the monochromatic chaos the images inspire.  Feast hungry vamps, feast.

Love is just a blood sport

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Clan of Heroes

No political blather [as previously promised] on this oddly shaped blog but this is kind of a huge special day.  I am filled with pride.  The future has a brighter gleam... I think it's called hope.

One of my absolute favorite evenings of 2011 was spent absorbing the bright synth lights of Clan of Xymox who visited our humble Numbers Nightclub in their only US show of that year.  AMAZING.

Beautiful, spectacular, transcendent. I think this David Bowie cover might just be better than the original... is that blasphemy?

Monday, November 5, 2012


Remember the other weekend when I made a 40 song beach mix for my little beachy getaway?  Well, here's an edited version with 21 tracks; a dreamy, warm mix for your hearing pleasure.  

Just pretend Monday is a distant memory.  I wish I were at home arting the day away.

Mac Demarco // Cat Power // T.Rex // Beach Fossils // Psychedelic Furs // Beirut // Future Islands // Pure Bathing Culture // Widowspeak // DrĂ¥pe // Jesse Ruins // R.E.M. // The Beach Boys // Fever Blanket // Craft Spells // Stornoway // Francisco the Man // Celebration // Featherface // Heavenly Beat // Otis Redding

Moan-day Mantra

I just keep telling myself only seven more days until my last day at this crap hole. I wonder if that's how Jesus felt during his 3 days of death before the ascension.  Obviously I'm feeling dramatic this morning.

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Pearly Dew Drops

Whirlwinds everywhere, mostly of my own making as I often caution others  to"Be kind to yourself.  Don't create unnecessary noise in your life".  Meanwhile, I seek chaotic frenetic encounters, hoping to draw the eddies from within to the surface.  Illuminating them in the hopes they evaporate in the bright glaring light of understanding.  Mostly what ends up happening are blinding hang over headaches and bouts of anxiety.  One day I will learn.

Queue Saturday 'morning'... ruminating in pajamas.  It's one of those Houston rainy days, not quite raining, not quite hot... not quite anything.  Balmy, grey.  Yesterday was Dia de los Muertos and also my mother's birthday.  Spontaneously invited to a Day of the Dead hang out hosted by two of my favorite Scorpios, one of whom celebrated his birthday on Thursday and the other who will celebrate hers tomorrow.  I told you I love Scorpios.

No sadness to be found among the yellow flowers strewn along the beautiful altar they created filled with candles and photos of loved ones past, including a forgotten photograph I gave to them awhile back of my mother and I taken only days after I was born.  She's holding me in our rocking chair and has this curious expression on her face, a cross between fear and peace.  The Scorps had laid out cups of water, alcohol, salt and a ciggie for our ghosts.  I contributed a stick of peppermint gum.  We drank wine and spoke of our lives as they are today in a genial braided way. 

Cocteau Twins - Pearly Dewdrops' Drops

Shadows on the periphery, Peace inaudibly whispers her name... closer and closer she approaches.

Friday, November 2, 2012

Setting Your Intentions

How do you set your metaphysical intentions, like one does in Yoga or other type of transcendental meditation? How do you accept and embrace the defining terms of your life?  Writer, Lover, Healer, Teacher.

Rising above oneself to abstract heights seems so beyond what I believe I'm able, when actually what I probably mean is that it's beyond what I want.  Desire is earth bound, selfish.  I even want Transcendence.  Returning always to him, a man I cannot possess.  I want to feel the intoxicating presence of being flesh bound in his gaze.  I want to be wanted while simultaneously reveling in the feeling that I'm unattainable.  I want to writhe in a passion unrequited.  Touching yourself in wet and dark places knowing He controls your mind.   With a mere flick of a finger, the bat of an eye, a salty tongue, breath in the ear...I want, I want, I want.

My desires are so of the Earth.  Always at war with my Mind.

The Cure - Halo

*How does that funny movie quote go?  "See?  You read a couple of Harlequin romance novels and they haunt you for life".... 

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Pop Never

I almost forgot to post a pumpkin cutebuster like last year's octo-kin.  This year I didn't carve a pumpkin, dress up or even hand out candy but instead cocooned in my web and avoided all the knocks at my door.  Including the one from my friend who even went so far as to bring me a gluten-free chocolate cupcake and ended up leaving it on my doorstep [because I was basically cowering inside pretending not to be home while my pup barked her demon beast head off] which I then quickly snatched and devoured in less than two minutes once the coast was clear. Jeez, I know it's a bit dramatic but I'm such a reclusive weirdo and really can't stand impromptu pop overs.

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Scattered scrambled zombie brains today but I'm super excited about all the awesome fall/winter inspired music I'm currently devouring and can't wait to share it with you. Stay tuned spooks. 
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